Giving Their Best
I was 26 weeks pregnant when we received the devastating news that our much wanted daughter had a form of dwarfism that would most likely prove fatal. After much consultation with the doctors, I was pretty much left on my own, to care for her, and myself, as best I could for the rest of the pregnancy.
They told me that if I got into trouble, they'd induce. Nothing more. If she got into trouble, they would not do anything, other than induce. No help would be offered her before, or after birth.
Her condition caused polyhydramnios - excess amniotic fluid. That caused contractions. I have never gone into labor, I do not produce the hormones necessary for it, but if my water broke, they'd induce labor without question. I wanted to give my daughter whatever chance at life she could have, and to give her the best possible chance of developing as much lung capacity as she was capable of. That meant keeping the pregnancy healthy.
The doctors did not tell me that bedrest was advised to reduce contractions with polyhydramnios. I read that during my own research. Since contractions did in fact lessen when I stayed down, my husband and I agreed that it would be best to keep me down as much as possible. I had a recliner, and that became my station for the next two and a half months.
I could not cook. My oldest son at home took over dinners. The next oldest boy fixed lunches. My younger daughters alternated fixing breakfasts (a lot of eggs, french toast, and pancakes).
The kids cleaned the house. They each took responsibility for a room - not so different from their usual chores, except that I could not longer oversee the jobs. The oldest boy did that, and kept the house looking at least somewhat cared for.
They did not want to leave me alone in the house, since I could not even get up to get a drink of water, so they took turns staying in with me. 15 minutes apiece. Not once did any one of them complain when it was their turn.
My kids have always done chores. They have always been expected to work very hard. There has never been a time though, when they worked without complaint, and did more than they were asked in the way they did when I was carrying Sidney.
I believe they acted out of love. And it was not love for ME, but for Sidney. And I think they were capable of that, because of what they felt from her.
Sidney did not draw more than a dozen breaths. I never saw her with her eyes opened, and her siblings never got to see her at all. But we felt her. We could feel her loving and joyful spirit while I carried her. It made us all better. Her brothers and sisters did what they did, because they loved her, so much, that they were willing to do whatever was asked of them, if it gave her a chance at life.
Written by Laura Wheeler
Owner, Firelight Web Studio
http://www.firelightwebstudio.com
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